Urgent Update

I know everyone is enraptured and awaiting an update... Well, at long last, the kite has been retrieved. (see This Post) With the help of daddy, a ladder, a broom stick and a rake, the kite was recovered. Although, it looks like it spent a week down in our garbage disposal, and Ella was devastated to learn it will never fly again.

So- I guess we'll be headed to the Dollar store to find a replacement sometime soon.

RIP Pooh...

How To

A detailed guide to the ultimate Jack-o-Lantern.

First, three year old will design the aesthetic, determining the mood, feeling, aura, and general artistic vision to be executed. 

Then, proper materials and resources must be gathered.

Never mind the pumpkin patch, we needed a place you could get a pumpkin, milk and candy. 

And, since we are pretty "kuntry," we used a serving spoon, a drywall knife and a dog's shedding blade. Yeah, I had to look up what the loop is called. Josh is the dog groomer 'round these parts.

Then, we got to work. Ella drew the face on with a Sharpie, I cut a little, Josh cut a little, Ella refused to touch anything, my mom stood by watching, bemused. Finally, after Josh gave up and went to the backyard to do something in the backyard, I convinced Ella to get her hands dirty and hep me clean it out. After 3.2 seconds she went in to wash up and I finished cleaning it and cutting the face out alone.

It took me a while to convince her to be photographed with it, then she decided she was hot and needed to help daddy fix the sprinkler system, so she threw on her 'kini. I mean, it was 85 degrees out.

Only in the south, huh? 

Why Mommy should definitely have her turn last

It was a nice afternoon, and early this evening a bit of a front blew through. Ella noticed the wind and ran to get her Winnie the Pooh kite for it's maiden voyage. 

We spent about 5 minute getting into the dang pack (why do they pack kids' toys like that? I need a screwdriver, needlenosed pliers and some loppers to get any frickin toy open...) and then 5 seconds "assembling" the thing, and off to the front yard we went. The front because we have

 these three barely living 15 foot trees in the back. WAY too much of a hazard.  

Well, luckily Ella and daddy tried first, and got it to fly for several 45 second periods of time before it slammed nose-first into the street again and again. Ella didn't believe that you have to move away from the kite instead of walking closer to it while flying. I sat on the tailgate and chatted up the guys cutting down the neighbors dead tree in the back, trying to talk him down on getting a stump ground out of our yard, but I digress. 

So after several nose-dives, one jaunt all-the-way down the cul de sac, and several screams from Ella, I demanded a turn. I shouldn't say much of anything regarding anyone else's kite-flying expertise or lack there-of (ahem), because about 12 seconds after I grabbed the string and took over, this happened:

Man, was Ella ever mad. She decided we needed Clifford (the Big Red Dog) to come over and get it down for us. We're still waiting on a call back. Or a BIG gust of wind. Whichever works. 

I hate plants

Well, no not really. I hate planting plants. It is not incredibly difficult, but man it takes forever! I have been working on our "landscaping" for two days now! It still looks like I let Ella do it, though. Maybe after today it will look a little better. I'd post pics, but I promised a long time ago I wouldn't show our homefront online. You know, for security reasons. 

Anyhow- I am bored out of my gourd waiting for the baby to wake up from his nap so I can go to the store and buy the last few plants and some Scrubbing Bubbles for my shower. I think I need one of those steamers. A girlfriend of mine was talking about how great they are, and it's been in the back corner of my brain ever since. 

I do have a few interesting pics from life in Norton-Ville: 

Baby Beds

A good ole fashioned Shadow Puppet show as performed by Ella and her lovely Mimi. Don't tell Ella it's supposed to be dark and there are actually supposed to be shadows...

Very carefully stacked tower 

And as I type this Ella has decided to show me how to "juggle apples." She took two apples and put them in her shirt- you know, "like a grown up lady," and started laughing hysterically. I'm not even going to take a picture of that. 

Maybe you're a Trashcan

"What are you doing mommy?" 

"I'm going to start dinner, I'm hungry"

"Hi, Hungry, I'm Ella"

And the sarcasm begins... 

Portrait by a 3 year old

No, it's not me.

She drew this, and informed me that it is a picture of Spongebob's Grandma! Of Course...

Engineering Marvel

We were driving to dinner the other night, and went up a sort of alley/side street. Then I saw this thing and started laughing. It is hilarious. I am guessing some civil engineer got paid at least a few grand for the analysis and design of this marvel of modern engineering. 

The thing is about as tall as Ella, the little tiny culvert/hole at the bottom is about 5 inches in diameter, and the little tiny notch/trapezoidal weir at the top is about 7 inches across by 6 inches deep, and the rip-rap/rock path is about a foot wide. The large gouges out of the earth on either side of this drainage fixture, where the water actually passes, were obviously the work of mother nature. 

I imagine it's one of those things where a mom sees their kid's science project out on the table after they've finished and gone off to bed, realizes its unfortunate state and inadequacy, and then tries to subtly make changes in an effort to at least save face for the chid. Like in this case, I'm sure the parking lot doesn't flood- not because whoever designed/built this thing did their job, but because the water flows out around the marvelous thing. 

I just love seeing things like this. It makes me laugh and then I get mad, because really... 

Hair

"I like your hair mom."

"Thanks, Ell!"

"Maybe I can cut it off and wear it around today."